Jambiani

We made an early start and headed for Zanzibar’s South East coast. The trip took a bit longer than expected, but at least we were in a comfortable air-conditioned bus. After dropping our luggage at the hotel we headed for the local village, where a guide took us to the school, and then demonstrations of making rope, grated coconut, coconut milk and woven elements all from the same tree. I had a go at the coconut scraping machine, which consists of sitting on a low stool with a very sharp blade between your, er, coconuts, and trying not to scrape anything other than coconut. Ooh-er.

It was very, very hot and by the end of the demonstrations we were all flagging a bit and headed for a slightly early lunch. I was focused on food and beer. However as we stepped out of the alleyway onto a beach all that evaporated at the sight of dozens of an aquamarine sea in amazing pre-storm light dotted with beautiful old dhows. I was in photographic heaven all the way for the long walk down the beach to our lunch venue.

After a very good lunch with, for a very welcome change, copious quantities of water (but sadly no beer) we waded out after the receding tide for a demonstration of seaweed farming, and photographed some women collecting shellfish. While we were drying out we were entertained by a tumbling act.

Back at the rather excellent if misleadingly named "Fun Beach Hotel" we spent the last couple of hours sitting around an enormous pool with pina-coladas. That’s more like it!

Dinner experienced a failure none of us had previously encountered. The food was tasty, well-cooked and accurately served. The drinks were another matter…

I had a fore-taste when the collective bar staff failed to comprehend the following related concepts:

• Yes, I did want to order 4 pina coladas, to be delivered to my cabin by the pool
• No, I was not going to drink them all. Other people would drink 3 of them
• No, I did not need to provide their room details. I was happy to pay for all 4 on my bilk

The first inkling of a problem surfaced when they served pre-dinner beers with what looked suspiciously like tooth mugs. Mine tasted as if some of the toothpaste was still there.

Several of the group ordered water (yet again not a default…) They received a large bottle of water and a shot glass.

Mark ordered a bottle of wine to share with me. The bottle turned up, but no glasses. We asked for glasses.

Two pina colada glasses turned up. We sent them away.

Two shot glasses turned up. In desperation we accepted them and started doing Merlot shots.

The general manager was consulted. Two wine glasses arrived, but one was immediately taken away to provide a glass of wine for Louise.

A few minutes later a third wine glass was located, and Mark could finally get the full benefit.

One wonders if this is a regular occurrence…